I need pressure – will I fail?

That social influences shape every person’s practices, judgments and beliefs is a truism to which anyone will readily assent.

Solomon Asch, Opinions and Social Pressure, 1995

Pressure is something I need, I have to admit it. I’ve grown up in a society and scholar system where you weren’t rewarded for extra work that you do on your own. You need to fulfill certain aims instead: reading some chapters of a book, answering the right question or writing an essay until a set deadline. But I never imagined my “real life” to become like that – I always did extracurricular things which made me happy.

Now that I am getting closer to the end of my education – I will finish my degree by the end of the year – I have to start thinking about my future (scary stuff).

What can I do with my life? I have many things that I want to try, but most of them sound like naive fantasies of a six-year old. And the problem is: the kind of creative life that I imagine cannot be taught to me in books or lectures. How I can support myself from here on without my – luckily – generous parents still riddles me.

It’s like one of these timed tests on the internet. The pressure makes my brain race too fast – and that takes every rational thought away from me immediately. I know I can do it, but I need time and courage to finally break out of my childish cave of security and jump into my own, independent adventure. Because now that no one puts pressure on me, I am the one who has to force my way into the future.

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elections are a funny thing

So, finally I get to vote. Good thing it is not complicated – Germany have developed the habit of either not caring of voting what the Wahl-o-mat (you just click your views on issues and the internet will make a decision for you) tells them to vote.

I try to keep an overview from here, but it is not easy. But when I unpacked my postal election material, I was a bit shocked. A pile of what felt like 700 colourful papers fell out.

The reason for that is that I am voting for the general and federal election. Such a challenge right at the beginning? And, what also adds up to it are the 6 referendums that Bavarians are deciding about – our consitution will probably be changed.

All of this adds up to like 3 hours for me. I wouldn’t say I’m the most political person in the world, but I am a member of a party and read news every day. But what about the people who do not? I will take them even longer – wherefore I could understand being too lazy to vote.

Whatever, I’m grabbing my non-existent reading glasses and a pen now and will dig in then…

Elections are a funny thing.